Friday, June 17, 2005

Sweet Sleep

Oh sweet sleep, why dost thou elude me so? Dancing and flirting on the periphery of my consciousness, plying your wondrous wares just out of reach. Oh sweet sleep, why dost thou torment me so? Singing your sweet song in your barley audible tone for all but me. I would that thou wouldst open your bounty and pour your coveted gift upon my weary frame but for a moment. In your sweet comfort do I desire to be, embraced in your warm embrace but for a moment.

Alas, it is not to be.

You torment me with the promise of your sweet presence and then dash my hopes into a thousand pieces and cast them to the wind. You lull me with your sweet song, inviting me in only to turn a cold face as I approach. In vain I seek your comfort. In vain I wait for your rest. What must I do sweet sleep? What must I do? What price would suffice an exchange between us. Tell me now that I may pay it and be done. But trouble me no more cursed strumpet. I would that thou should leave me entirely than to tempt me to madness.

Alas, It is not to be.

Sweet sleep mocks me, laughs as it turns a deaf ear to my plea. Knowing my need and ignoring it all the same. I will hold out hope, no matter the cost. I shall one day find the embers of what we once had restoked to a blazing fire. Sweet sleep I will wait for your return. Oh yes, I will wait.

In other words I've been have trouble sleeping. Partly because of my roommate, and partly because I don't know why, I just can't sleep. I'll fall asleep for about a half hour and then I'm wide awake. I'll lay there, mad at my roommate for playing video games so late into the night, and hope sleep will come. It hasn't as of late. I talked with my roommate and he agreed to knock off earlier but I don't think that's the full problem. I guess we'll just have to wait and see.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Loved your shakespearean style writing. It really was good. Amazing how even with no sleep your mind is still so sharp, I could never write something so clever, even if I slept for two weeks straight. Are you able to take a valium or something, or is that too dangerous considering your surroundings? I will pray specifically for your much needed sleep. scm

2:54 PM  
Blogger Papa Ray said...


Your sleeping problems most likely won't get any better once your home.

A little word of advice, don't let anyone get you started on taking sleeping pills. They are hard to get off of and you will wake up tired and screwed up.

Been there done that.

I had to make my peace with a lot of ol' ghosts then I was able to sleep.

But..the dreams were almost enough to make me not want to sleep.

They got better over the years but I am visited sometimes by my long lost friends. But they are more
friendly now.

Stay in the groove.

Papa Ray
West Texas

11:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, so liberal with the words . . . strumpet. Needed to put a warning on your blog for language. : ) Just Joken'.

1:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

We'll pray for you to get some sleep. In the beginning when my arthritis started I could not sleep well either. It was a VERY long time before I was able to sleep a whole night through and it was awful. I would wake up constantly from pain and not just "oh, I'm awake, what time is it....zzzzzz" but fully awake. I know what you mean and we'll pray for sweet sleep. On another note, in our neighborhood I've seen two homes decorated for soldiers coming home in the past couple of weeks and it makes me anticipate your return even more. I see all these decorations for these people and imagine the excitement for everyone that knows them. That's how it will be for all of us and you. How much we all anticipate it! And not too much longer! Hang in there! M. Pads Coach

11:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How excited I am! Not for you losing sleep...but that time has marched on. I looked at the list of months to side of your blog. 10 months! Wow! I went back and read the first few. How those days seemed so hard and were so "easy". We are coming up to the anniversary of that dreaded letter. What a strange anniversary that is...painful because it marks the time you left but how wonderful because it announces your ever closer homecoming. When I think of how hard it is and not wanting to do this anymore, I look back over those 10 months. We've gone through this just shy of a year! We can do a couple more. God has brought us all through this; He will not leave us now. I pray you see Him everyday. I pray those around you feel His presence in your life and are forever changed because of that.
Sleep. Remember those days of having a newborn...not much then either. Somehow you made it through. May God give you rest and rejuvination when you need it most. (You haven't gotten hooked on coffee have you?)
Last night I saw the moon, low in the sky, buttery yellow, big and peaceful. I wondered if you were able to enjoy the moment of peacefulness looking at it from your side of the world. The wondering turned to prayer. I know prayer is a powerful thing, but at times, it does't seem enough. Another moment of surrender, I suppose. God is powerful and with you always. CnH

11:04 AM  
Blogger membrain said...

I just found your blog. I hope the sleep demons loosen their hold and let you rest. I just want to thank you for you service to you country and the world. I'm a former Canadian soldier who believes we should be with you in Iraq as we are in Afghanistan. Stay as safe as you can. Godspeed.

12:46 PM  

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