Thursday, August 18, 2005

"What Would You Do?" The Game Show Results

Just after I posted the first nationally syndicated episode of "What Would You Do?" The Game Show we lost internet connectivity here at FOB Justice keeping me from monitoring the contestants feedback. Here I am back online and glad to announce the correct answers and the contestants that will advance to the always exciting lightning round of "What Would You Do?" The Game Show.

The correct answers were:

Situation one:

C) Stand in the middle of the road and wait until you see the suction truck that sucks all the crud out of the septic tanks and chemical toilets. When you see him ask him to empty his truck full of solid human waste, urine, blue port-o-podie water, and who knows what other disease spreading contaminates all over the field where you plan to play soccer in the next oh say 30 minutes. Then when asked how you could possibly think this is a good idea just keep repeating in broken English, "I just want to do good things. I just want to do good things."

Situation two:

D) Choose C first and then when you realize the situation isn't getting any better, or maybe because the American's hysterical laughter peaked your curiosity as to what could be that funny, you get up off the ground, dust yourself off and decide to try out choice B about 10 times until an American with a fire extinguisher pushes you out of the way and puts the fire out in about 0.425 seconds.

I'll include the answers B and C since they were referenced in the correct answer

  • B) Use the very same hose, which is long enough to reach the fire, but instead of dousing the flames with the hose you instead repeatedly fill and empty a single liter bottle onto the hood never actually making contact with the fire but doing a good job of getting the side of the hood wet just incase the flames make it to that particular spot before the gas tank explodes.

  • C) Throw all the Styrofoam containers out of the truck onto the sidewalk, the reason for which you're not entirely sure. Stop drop and roll even though you're not on fire prompting the other four or five guys to do the same. So now not only are you not putting out the fire, you're just getting dirty and the Americans are now pointing and taking pictures.
Situation three:

D) After about 4 seconds of deliberation you decide a combination of a little bit of A followed by a short pause for medical reasons, and a simultaneous execution of B and C would best solve the problem.

Again, I'll include A, B, and C for reference.

  • A) Try the drill in another outlet to make sure the one you're using hasn't been disconnected but immediately dismiss that as a foolish thought because you're pretty sure it has power. After all when you stuck your screw driver in it a minute ago it popped real loud and shot fire up your forearm causing you to throw the already half melted and charred screwdriver across the room.

  • B) Cut the plug off of your drill and strip the ends of the wires. Next you just shove the bare wires into the slots on the 220V outlet hoping that solves the problem and doesn't reward you with the same electrical magic show the screw driver trick did

  • C) Send your assistant to the basement to stand in ankle deep sewage and water because the sewage pump is broken and randomly flip switches and pull fuses out of the main fuse box to the whole building having no idea if he's helping or not because he's three floors away.

Our panel of expert judges has reviewed the responses and are proud to announce the finalist in the first ever episode of "What Would You Do?" The Game Show.

The winners are:

April with her response of:

  • Hmmm...tough ones. I really think I'd go C, D and D. After careful deliberation, I would say that these seem like the best answers. So, did I win? :) Thanks for the laugh. April

jamie good said:

  • Not speaking from experience.....I am going to go with C, D, D, but then again, all of the above wasn't an option.That was just too funny!!! Please follow up with what really happened. And I bet you anything your grandmother said it as loudly as the rest of us.

And after a long deliberation, and an actual fist fight between two of the celebrities on the panel, our judges decided to accept Peter's answer.

Peter said:

  • Given the seemingly prevailing attitudes among so many of the locals I'd have to go with D in all three scenarios although I wouldn't faint with shock to have seen 'C' in the first one.

The judges decided to accept Peter's answer for a number of reasons that I feel require some clarification. First, and most important, he was the only male contestant to respond almost correctly. Secondly, as a small child I was so moved by the Brady Bunch episode where the Brady kids made their own singing group and tried out for a contest. In this particular episode Peter was going through a not so comfortable time in the exciting and scary life of a young boy. I'm sure we all remember the fateful day his voice changed right in the chorus of "When it's time to change you've got to rearrange". I was so moved by that episode that right there on the spot I swore that if I was ever recalled into the military and had the first ever blog/game show exploiting the cultural differences between Americans and Iraqis that I would do everything within my power to help anyone named Peter who got two out of three answers correct only to change at the last minute and get all three. And if I don't have my word as a Brady Bunch fan what do I have? So Peter, don't let me down in the always exciting lightning round of "What Would You Do?" The Game Show.

I thought I'd lay down the ground rules for the next round here in this blog and then actually run the program in the next blog. For the always excitng lightning round of "What Would You Do?" The Game Show we at the network have decided to take the production to a whole new level. The next round will consist of pictures with three scenarios following each picture. Two of the scenarios will be completely fictitious with one being the actual set of circumstances surrounding that particular picture. We've scanned high and low to find the best pictures possible and think we have come up with three choices worthy of the first ever always exciting lightning round of "What Would You Do?" The Game Show. We're also excited to announce the planning phase for the all new "What Would You Do?" The Clothes, which is a line of fine men's wear and boxers, and the much anticipated "What Would You Do?" The Lunch Box. We would also like to apologize to anyone whose lives have forever been altered by the marketing, sale, and subsequent law suit invovled with the "What Would You Do?" The Nasal Spray. It seems, upon reflection, the industrial strength jet stream areosol applicator was a bit over kill. Fortunately we found a new niche and after some re labeling we should be able to unveil the all new "What Would You Do?" The Roach and Ant Killer.

So stay tuned for the always exciting lightning round of "What Would You Do?" The Game Show.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm still laughing from the previous post. I was going to try with some answers to your game show, but, since I couldn't stop laughing, I was afraid to get all that 'drooly spit' on the keybord:-) Can't wait for the final round to begin.
L at dartmouth

1:05 PM  
Anonymous jamie good said...

YEAH!!!! I am so honored to have won.

But I really must stress the importance that I wasn't speaking form experience. :o)

Can't wait for the lightning round. Can I get some nasal and ant killer as a consolation prize if I don't make it to the final round?

6:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I always get a kick out of your posts. What will we do when you're home and we can't check in on your life like this anymore? M. Pads Coach

8:52 PM  
Anonymous jck said...

Your game is wonderful! Too bad I lurked instead of played. But keep it coming.

And by the way, like your other postings as well. Keep 'em coming!

10:05 PM  
Blogger membrain said...

That was just too funny!! I didn't play because I just saw it today. Great stuff.

12:54 PM  
Blogger bozette said...

Well just stopped by to say THANK YOU, for all you are doing. Keep up the good work.

4:17 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was just wondering, do we get to see any pictures again soon? You know how I love pictures. It would be really great to see pictures of each scenario. But maybe not the soccer field one, I don't know if I could stomach that one. Looking forward to your next blog. scm

3:57 PM  
Blogger Chevy Rose said...

You are one funny guy or sniffing Elmer'
God bless, stay safe.

11:24 PM  

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